The house is quiet. I am here all alone, everyone having cleared out so that I can recuperate from yesterday’s tooth extraction. I feel well, but did notice that lifting a bag of garbage out of the pail resulted in a tugging sensation in the spot that used to house a molar in the back of my mouth. It surprised me and then served as a reminder that my body, once again, had been through something and that I had best just lay low and take things easy. I am not very good at doing that, although G-d knows I have had many instances in which it was the thing to do.
I have not put on the television or the stereo to serve as background noise. The only sounds are of the bubbler in the fish bowl (we have the longest living Purim carnival fish on the face of the earth…I believe we are on year five) and the clicking of the keyboard. Even the dishwasher has finished its job and is silent on the other side of the house, just waiting for someone to empty it. I have consciously decided that I will not be that person today. And, while often such silence makes me anxious and antsy, today that is not the case.
Today I am allowing my body and soul to take a rest. I am not rushing to shower so that I can accomplish errands (of which there are always many). I am not slipping off my comfy pjs in exchange for jeans. In fact, the only thing I am actively considering doing is crawling back under the covers and taking a nap. I am suddenly so acutely aware of my profound exhaustion that said nap may be a necessity as opposed to a luxury. And I cannot blame it on a tooth.
I can ascribe responsibility to any number of things potentially responsible for that groggy, gonna-go-lay down urge, yet I will not. It is not only impossible to lay blame on one issue but it doesn’t particularly matter, either. In fact, I am (nearly) literally patting myself on the back for allowing myself to just lose a day and baby myself. Everything can wait. There is nothing that has to happen today that cannot be tackled tomorrow. And, if we are being truthful here, I may waste tomorrow, too.
If you have nowhere to be, nothing to do and no one relying on you (yeah, lotsa luck with that) I encourage you to do the same.
p.s. Lest you think this is the pain killers talking, let me assure you it isn’t as I am not taking any (don’t need ‘em)…just letting go a little bit. You might want to give it a whirl yourself…